Happy New Year

It's easy to get melancholy at this time of year. Looking back on the year behind us, we often think of the sad times and hope that next year will bring happier times. Don't we do that every year? So, I decided that I would write a post to celebrate the great things that have happened this year. 

Don't get me wrong, I have had bad times this year. I've experienced things which have made me cry, shout, scream and want to break things or just to run away from it all. Facebook has soaked up most of that (that dreaded FB word again). I've lost special people this year and it'll take time to feel better about that. But, this is a happy post...

1. I was diagnosed with ADHD. Yes, this is a good thing. Imagine having lived for 39 years feeling different and not understanding why; trying to control things which were out of your control. How frustrating would that be? Well, it was very frustrating. Now I have a licence to be who I am. I have a piece of paper that says it's okay to be this way. I am still not allowed to call out in class or jump on the tables, but maybe that's being saved for 2014!




2. I watched with growing pride as my son, Big J, learnt to play the guitar. He completely loses himself in his guitar playing. It takes him to another place. When he's playing, I can't help but sit and watch.

3. For the first time that I can remember, Little Z took her practice for her Grade 4 ballet exam very seriously. She was self motivated and it was amazing to watch. This quiet girl, who can, at times, struggle with challenges Aspergers Syndrome brings, came to life as she danced around the living room. She stood tall, she was graceful and elegant. She looked confident. It wasn't until the results came through saying she'd passed with a Merit, that I realised just how uncertain she had been about whether she had passed at all.

4. Larry has run just over 1000 miles this year. He completed his first marathon as well as many other competitive races. He raised an amazing £614 for Macmillan Cancer Support through taking part in the Great South Run in October. For someone who is always willing to put himself out to help other people, It makes me happy to see him doing something for himself that he enjoys.

5. I sat with tears in my eyes as Big J decided not to go in to his Brown Belt karate grading, because he would be the only one in there. I remember wanting so much for him to prove to himself that he was capable; blaming myself for not instilling in this boy the confidence he needed to go in there and give it his best shot, no matter whether he passed or failed. I then paced up and down, taking deep breaths and not taking my eyes off the door, after he'd finally decided to go in. Then hugging him so tightly when he came through the doors to the whistles, cheers, and claps of the black belts, his Sempai and Sensei. Definitely one to remember.

6. I have lost almost 3 stone this year. That's 41 pounds! People who know me and are reading this may be a little confused. I started running (using the Wii Fit + package and a trampete) in September, just 30 mins every day, and since then have just reached my 2 stone mark. However, I had already lost almost a stone earlier in the year when I had tried Paul McKenna's Hypnotic Gastric Band book & CD (It was great, but I just didn't stick to it. I'd still highly recommend it to anyone.) I have rediscovered my old wardrobe (or at least some of it!)



7. I got a bit of my life back, by taking time for myself. I went out with my friend instead of trailing around after school clubs or going home to tidy the house. I still went to watch my kids do their activities, but not every single time. I haven't neglected the housework, but it sometimes has to wait an extra day. No big deal.




8. Larry and I actually got to go out without the children. We just went shopping, but we went by ourselves. We enjoyed each other's company. We had full conversations without having to break off to ask the children to stop doing something or listen to their interruptions. We didn't realise how much we'd missed it, until we had it back.


We spent time with family and friends, baked pretzels, saw lots of rhinos, went camping in North Wales, played rounders, fooled around, felt lucky to have missed the falling trees during the October storms, went to the beach, played in the snow (not on the same day, or course), spent too much time on Minecraft, went exploring in the woods, climbed waterfalls and more...

 These are just a few of the amazing times I have had this year. Life is good. Sometimes we just have to focus on those good bits.

May 2014 bring all of you many good times too.

Avoiding Desolation

For one reason or another, yesterday did not get off to a great start. I had been angry the previous afternoon about the way I had been treated by the jumped up, just-out-of-pre-school salesmen (yes, 'men'. There were 2 of them!) in the O2 shop, when collecting my new mobile phone. Having then got even more cross with myself for the way I had reacted and at my failure to control my reaction, I had gone to bed grumpy with the world.

I had expected to wake up yesterday feeling fresh and ready to go for a run, as usual, but instead woke up with what I can only describe as an 'emotional hangover'. No alcohol involved! I busied myself with nothing in particular; a couple of phone calls, Facebook (what to do when there's nothing to do!) ending up here, on my Blog.

So, Larry came up with a plan to take us all to the cinema. It would cheer me up and would give us all a treat before the end of the holidays. Fantastic idea! Little Z (who is now 14 and probably will not approve of being called 'Little' for much longer, seeing as she is now about 5'7" and towers above me!) and I have been keen to see the new Hunger Games Movie, 'Catching Fire' having read and really enjoyed all the books.

"I thought we'd go to see 'The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug'," he said excitedly. "You'll like that. You enjoyed the first one." He prompted, having seen my blank expression as I tried to choose an appropriate response, rather that the one I was thinking. My suggestion that Little Z and I could go to see Catching Fire, while Larry and Big J went to see The Desolation of Smaug, was met with the (quite reasonable) point that that would not be 'quality family time', especially as Catching Fire is showing at a different cinema to The Desolation of Smaug. I really couldn't (reasonably) argue.

We all thoroughly enjoyed the film. Big J and I even managed to sit still (sort of) for the 3 hours (including ads and trailers). Now, Little Z and I must hatch a plan to see Catching Fire before the end of the holidays.

Can't Weight...

I've been blogging (admittedly with long periods of absence every now and then) for about 8 years now. I must have blogged several times about being overweight or trying to lose weight. Well, here I go again...

Back in August, I had got so frustrated with being overweight and not having any nice clothes that would fit. Every Saturday I take Big J to his karate class, where I then sit and watch / chat with other parents for 2 hours. Yes, I know, 2 hours is a very long time to sit and talk, but if you know me, then you know that talking for 2 hours is no great challenge for me. However, I decided to download an app for my phone (it's called Map My Walk... guess what it does!) and go walking in the local area for 45 mins. I felt better for it, but it wasn't enough to shift any weight. Quite honestly, I look back now and think, "What the hell was I expecting? I was eating far more that I needed and one session of brisk walking for 45 mins every week is not enough to even sustain my weight let alone lose any.

I met a guy... No, no, no, it's not one of those kind of stories. I already have my own amazing guy (I will not crowbar him in here, he deserves a whole blog just for himself). I met a guy at karate. He told me his story of how he'd lost so much weight over the past 3 years and taken up running and cycling. I was inspired. Now, I am quite a stubborn person and will not always take other people's advice, especially if I am being told what to do... (again, this is another post entirely), but the more I listened, the more it made sense. He showed me an app on his phone called Couch to 5k. For those not familiar with it, it gets you off the couch and teaches you how to run 5k and, as the name suggests, it is for people who don't run at all, but usually sit around on the couch. Okay, this is beginning to sound like I liked it. I hated it! I started on the treadmill and was always watching the clock to see how long it was till I could get off. That's not the attitude I needed to be able to sustain it for the length of time I needed to lose the 8+ stone I had to get rid of.

The thing is, I was not a 'sit on the couch' kind of person, and I wasn't new to running either, so I decided to go back to what I knew best. The Nintendo Wii Fit. Out came the trampete (mini trampoline for running on the spot). As soon as i was back on there, I felt completely different. I enjoyed it, which meant that getting up a little earlier than usual was not so difficult. I would usually get up at 6.15 every day anyway, so getting up at 5.50 just meant that I had lost 25 mins sleep (hardly noticeable), had to hurry up getting ready for work (not that difficult), and had to make sure the children got themselves ready (they are 9 and 14 - it's not a lot to ask!).

So, since September I have been getting up at 5.50 am almost every day and doing 30 minutes running. The Wii Fit times me and records the distance I run. I know you could argue that the distance isn't accurate, after all, I am running on the spot, but it is consistent and so I have a benchmark. To start with I was running about 6k in 30 mins. Now, I run an average of 7.5k in that time.

I only set myself the goal of losing 1lb per week and have exceeded that. I now find it easier to listen to my body signals telling me that I am hungry or that I am full. My attitude towards food and exercise has changed completely. In the past I have found it hard to stay motivated, but I am kept motivated by the fact that I am steadily losing weight and enjoying the exercise as well as enjoying rediscovering my old wardrobe.

I have lost 2 stone (28 lb) since 4th September 2013. I aim to lose at least another 4 stone in 2014. I'm lucky to have amazing friends and family who, despite thinking I'm mad, give me the support and encouragement I need.

Review: The Thirteenth by G. L. Twynham

The Thirteenth by G. L. Twynham
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I really liked this story. It was fast paced from the start and I liked the characters, who were interesting and developed as the story did. If I had to complain about it at all, I would say that the spelling mistakes drove me mad. I like to really get into a story and it was easy with this book as it was so exciting, but the numerous errors were irritating as I think they could so easily have been avoided.

Personally, I think each book in a trilogy or series should stand alone so that it can be read completely and with a satisfactory story resolution and no obligation to read the next in the series. This book does not fit into that category. However, it is a great story and if you can forgive the spelling errors, it is a series that will keep you turning the pages until you have finished. Well worth a read.

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Molly Gumnut Rescues a Bandicoot by Patricia Puddle
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

This is a story about cheeky 8 year old, Molly Gumnut as she sets out with her father's camera to take a wildlife photo for the school calendar. In her attempts to find something interesting to photograph, she comes across the neighbour's cat, Tiddles, playing with a ball, which actually turns out to be baby bandicoot, a protected native marsupial. So begins the rescue of the injured animal and the adventures and mischief Molly Gumnut gets up to on the way.

I am a mum and a primary school teacher, so I read quite a few children's books and I'm afraid this isn't among my favourites.

First of all, I felt that the overall structure of the story was weak. It would have been better if there were fewer events so there could be more build up to them, creating excitement and anticipation of the smaller events throughout the story. The calendar photograph was the underlying story thread which nicely linked the beginning with the end and coincided well with her finding and releasing the Bandicoot. I felt the other events dragged the story out too much and detracted too much from the plot. Children's books need to model good structure of stories as well as interesting language. This story was too repetitive and the plot was too 'untidy' with lots of extra events which could have been left out to create a clearer and more easily readable story.

I found it hard to warm to Molly. She was annoying in the way she acted quite selfishly and in the way she spoke to others. This behaviour seemed to contradict the fact that coming from a nice family, better behaviour would have been modelled and expected. It infuriated me at times that the adults around her, who were caring and seemed to have good values, were not consistent in managing Molly's increasingly challenging behaviour. She simply seemed to get away with being 'impudent' and doing as she pleased, although at other times they suddenly became strict and imposed sanctions. There were times that I thought Molly was an intelligent girl, especially when talking about how to care for animals, but her actions didn't generally reflect that. Children do act erratically at times and frequently do things without thinking of the consequences, but Molly repeatedly got into that kind of trouble, which didn't seem realistic.

Similarly, I found the other characters in the story inconsistent or unbelieveable. Grandma was sometimes strict and got cross and at other times she was easy going and gentle natured; dad sometimes laughed off Molly's antics and at other times got angry at her; mum often let her get her own way, yet also put her foot down and imposed strict consequences. The sisters could have been introduced at the beginning, but we are suddenly introduced to them when they have a role to play. Again, if the author had focussed on fewer acts of Molly's mischief, she could have made more of Gretchen, developing her character more and therefore making her more believeable and adding another layer to the story.

During the story, I was left with questions about things that just didn't make sense. Why did people keep trusting Molly to be left alone when she clearly couldn't be trusted? Why didn't anyone call Gran to tell her that Molly had been found? Why would Mrs Wilson blame herself for Molly going missing, especially after Molly was so rude to her.

I like the idea of using photographs to illustrate a story, but I think it has to be done very carefully and I'm not sure that's the case here. I'm afraid I didn't really like the pictures in this book; somehow they didn't quite fit the story. They either looked like the story had been conveniently changed to fit the picture or the photo was staged to fit the story.

I'm sorry to play the teacher here, but there were a large number of errors in this book, which I think could have been avoided. There were many spelling mistakes, even in Molly's name on one occasion, and some words missing here and there. It was quite repetitive, using the same language over and over again (eyes popped wide; tears clouded her eyes) and sometimes repeating the same phrase almost as though the author had forgotten she had already included that particular thought or idea.

Overall, I think the idea for the story is a good one, but it needs to be developed more carefully. I think it would make a lovely short story and could imagine children enjoying watching it as a series on TV.

As it is, I'm afraid I would not read it to a class of children or give it to my own children to read.


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What a week! (2?)

Hmmm, not exactly the most explanatory title I've ever written, but nevertheless quite appropriate. Why the (2?)? Well, it's the sort of title I have probably used before and short of looking through everything to check, I have just called it '2' in the hope that no one will question it. In fact, I probably would have got away without anyone questioning it, had I not just drawn attention to it. Anyway, enough about the title...

One of my new year's resolutions this year was to get a job.That might sound pretty straight forward, after all, "There's plenty of work out there for people who really want it," [northern accent essential for this to be effective]  I hear echoes from my dad's voice from when I was looking for a Summer job while I was at Uni. He's quite right of course, but that relies on the 'job seeker' being willing to do just about anything. We all have our excuses. Here's mine:

I spent 4 years at Uni and another two-years-crammed-in-to-one-year doing my PGCE having left a well paid job I was successful at. Why would I want to work hard to complete my training only to go on to do a job which pays even less than I was earning before? It would make no sense. I trained as a teacher and that's the job I want.

Many people who read my blog have followed my quest to find a permanent teaching post since completing my PGCE in 2006. By my own admission I have been neccessarily fussy when it comes to applying to schools. I need a school which will be understanding about the fact that I have a family; a school where the staff are supportive and help each other instead of talking about each other behind their backs; a school where I fit in and don't have to pretend to be someone or something I am not, and a school whose head has high expectations, yet also has respect for the staff and remembers what it was like to be on the frontline, appreciates how many extra hours teachers put in and frequently shows that appreciation. That's not unreasonable, I think, but it's astonishing how few and far between those kinds of schools seem to be.

Over the years I've had my fair share of interviews. Of course, interviews for teachers are not simply about turning up and answering questions. There is invariably a teaching observation and often other activities such as assessment of work. Some of the interviews have gone well and some not so well. It almost always comes down to who you are up against, so although a few of my interviews have resulted in me being offered a job, many have not. It's sometimes been because there was someone who performed better, less frequently because the other candidates and I were not what they were looking for and so they simply didn't appoint anyone, but most infuriating, it has often come down the the fact that I have been competing with hundreds of NQTs who are cheaper and usually younger with fewer home commitments.

The supply teaching work has been fantastic. It's flexible, pays well and I've met some great people and seen all sorts of things done in many different ways. It's been a different kind of experience to what I'd have had if I'd taken a permanent teaching job after qualifying. Unfortunately it has made me fussy about the type of school I wanted to work at, which I had begun to doubt I would ever get to work at, so recently I made a few decisions, fuelled by the lack of supply and therefore the lack of income. I began to look elsewhere.

It was not easy to decide to stop teaching. As I said above, why would I train so hard for so long simply to take a job outside of teaching, but having carefully considered the pros and cons and finally decided to give something else a try, within a short space of time I had 2 interviews lined up for this week. One paid considerably more than the other and I spent a lot of time deliberating about what to do if one offered a position before I had heard about the other etc. Finally thinking I had a firm plan of what to do, everything took an unusual turn.

Out of the blue, I had a phone call from a headteacher saying she had a position she thought I might be interested in and, having interviewed me last year, she would like me to go in for an informal chat. The following day after having another look around the school while chatting about the job, I sat in her officeand accepted the job. That was it. No further interview; no observation. Why can't everything be that easy?

Oh, did I say 'Easy'? I start after half term, which means I have two weeks to get up to speed and ready to go. Hmmm, 'Easy' was probably not the most appropriate word. It does seems to have happened quite suddenly, but also quite smoothly. So, what's the catch? Well, nothing. Oh, except the one thing I have come to expect now whenever I move schools (which has been quite a regular occurrence)... Ofsted are due any time. Oh well, it makes it interesting and 6 Ofsteds in 6 years is something not many teachers can say they've done.