What The Hell Was I Thinking?

What in Hell is up with Heaven?: No rest for the wicked... by Christopher David Petersen

My rating: 1 of 5 stars


I didn't like this book; I found it very odd. I know it is supposed to be a religious satire, but it's just not what I expected. To begin with, the conversation between God and Satan is amusing, especially the "Does the Pope sh*t in the woods" conversation, but it just isn't enough to make a whole book out of. I quickly grew tired of the cheap gags. Again, it is amusing to think God might have a spitting contest or might have to go on a diet, but these are stand alone jokes and none of them really gel together to make an interesting read.

This book is unusual, in that many of the characters are ones we are already very familiar with. I don't think that was a problem, but the personalities of the characters were not consistent making them difficult to believe. Their dialogue didn't match their personalities and I found it annoying that the characters' styles of speech changed so regularly.

There were many spelling and grammatical errors, which a quick proof read could have corrected. That on its own usually spoils a book for me, because it feels like the book has been rushed to the publishers without the attention to detail required. If an author can't be bothered to read their own book, why should I?





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Big J versus The Big Fella

Last week Big J was playing Cuponk with little success, when I heard him saying, "I wish I could get really good at playing Cuponk", fair enough, and then I heard him add, "Amen," and realised he was praying for better Cuponk skills! I laughed to myself as he continued listing things he wished for in the same way: "I wish... Amen."

We have not really talked to Big J about God, not being particularly religious or going to church ourselves, so I guessed he'd just heard prayers at school and thought he'd try them out to see if they worked.

Yesterday, we were all stuck at home after it snowed so much that the schools closed, so we went to the Sports Centre with a makeshift sledge. It started out as a lot of fun; we all had a go sliding down the slopes, having snow fights and generally having a good time. Then Big J started to get really cold and wanted to go home. His insistance that we go home NOW turned into anger at the snow and a declaration that he hated it...

"I hate snow, I really hate it....

...and I hate God, 'cos he made snow. That's just stupid. Why did he make such a stupid thing? He's an idiot. It's rubbish. He just made a load of rubbish...

...I hate the whole earth. He thinks it's good, but it's rubbish...

...I hate God. He's a poopy pants. He poos in his nappy. Anyway, I don't believe in him any more..

...How can he get up into space anyway without a rocket or something? I don't think he exists...

...And I hate Jesus. I hate God and Jesus. They are both rubbish..."

So, that seems pretty clear then. My son is not about to devote his life to God, apparently.

He did say today that he does actually like snow again now. I didn't dare ask what he thought of God today! I think I'll wait till he's playing Cuponk again!

For God's sake...

This is mad! Inciting racial hatred? Aren't they doing that by the way they are treating her? Can we take seriously a country which still lashes people in public? Is it a crime to make a mistake?

What a ****ed up world we live in!

Twelve Year Anniversary

I am very proud to say that PP and I celebrated our 12 year wedding anniversary yesterday. Despite being told we were too young (20 & 23) and not ready for marriage, we tied the knot at 2pm on Saturday 17th December 1994 at St James' Church in Grimsby . It makes me feel quite old to have been married for so long, especially when I think that most of my uni friends with whom I did my PGCE were still at Junior school back then. For the first few years we followed the tradition of buying something of paper, something of wood etc. We got bored of that pretty quickly and although we did continue to buy each other gifts up until last year, we now just buy cards. It is so close to Christmas that we have decided not to spend more money on presents for our anniversary. We usually celebrate with a meal out or a meal in, although invariably since Big J has been born, we have spent our anniversaries at home as it is too much hard work trying to keep him occupied when we go out. This year we didn't even bother with a meal. This was not as a result of a conscious decision made by us, we simply hadn't planned it very well (actually, we hadn't planned it at all!) We did do something quite special though...

With little Z's increased interest in Christianity, I have been promising for a while now to take her along to a church, but have been putting it off because I did not feel comfortable walking into a church full of strangers. Last time we did that, we were going to hear our banns read a few weeks before our wedding and were practically pounced upon by the regular members of the congregation asking us to get involved in various events. Needless to say this put us off going back to that church (apart from to get married), even if that had been our intention. However, having recently got back in touch with a friend who goes to church regularly, I decided to ask her about the Carol Service at Central Baptist Church, in Southampton. I was happy that we were not going to be cajoled into getting involved more than we wanted to and so we went along to "Carols by Candlelight" at 6.30pm. Big J was as disruptive as could have been expected, Little Z took it all very seriously and looked quite solemn, until they offered her cake and juice at the end of the service. We all enjoyed ourselves: Big J had lots of cars and a wooden garage to play with, Little Z made a Christingle, PP had mince pies and I had mulled wine. Well, anywhere where you can get free food & alcohol must be good!

How do you solve a problem like Little Z?

For 2-3 years now, Little Z has been taking an increasing interest in God. As we do not go to church ourselves and do not consider ourselves religious, she must have decided this based on her experiences of Religious Education at school. She does not go to a C of E school, but the school is very proud of its RE syllabus and does put quite a strong emphasis on teaching Children about Christianity.

I have always believed that children need to make their own decisions about their beliefs and not have their parents' (or anyone elses for that matter) beliefs thrust upon them. For that reason, I have not had either of my children Christened, particularly as I do not go to church and am not willing to stand in a house of God with a new baby promising to bring them up in the way of the Church, when I have no intention of doing so. I appreciate that many people get their babies Christened because of pressure from their families. It is not my place to condemn them. I am simply saying that I decided not to do it because I don't think it is right.

I have digressed somewhat from my point. Little Z has told me she is a Christian on many occasions since starting school. I have been to see her teacher to discuss their RE syllabus and actually, I am quite happy that they are not telling the children what they believe. She now tells me she has decided to become a nun. When someone asked her, "Do you even know what a nun is?", she replied, "Yes, I am going to give my life to God." Wow.

So, how does this happen? My Church-going friends say it is a calling from God. My Atheist friends say it is a phase and she has probably watched "The Sound of Music" too often.

God bless you!